Thursday, September 27, 2007

Roswell explained

When not running Modern Marvels or shows about Hitler and World War II, The History Channel is known to run UFO shows. I had one on in the background today about Hangar 18.

Of course, Roswell came up. And of course, they mentioned that the Army had issued a press release saying they had captured a flying saucer.

Most conspiracy theorists like to point to that press release as the one irrefutable fact in the Roswell case that proves it was a flying saucer.

I'll explain why exactly that press release was made.

On June 24, 1947, Kenneth Arnold reported seeing UFOs over Mount Rainier. This was actually the event that coined the term "Flying Saucer".

Less than two weeks later, the Army claimed that one had crashed in New Mexico.


That, my friends, was the lamest attempt at a cover story ever. Some secret project -- later identified as Project Mogul -- crashed in New Mexico, and because the Army was the Army, they figured they had to put out a cover story. Some idiot remembered the Ken Arnold story and decided the cover story would be that it was a flying saucer. In short, Roswell was the biggest PR blunder possibly of all time.

What about the rest of it? The rancher, the people who tell all kinds of stories? That's just bullshit. It can all be dismissed as bullshit. Yes, BULLSHIT.

Conspiracies are easy. Some idiot comes up with one and it is denied by officials, then the conspiracy people believe that denial means it must be true! We live among conspiracy nuts. This is a world where a hundred million people watched live as the second plane hit the World Trade Center, and yet Truthers want to claim there's a conspiracy, bombs in the building, that no plane crashed into the Pentagon, and so on. And once a conspiracy gets started, it can never die because of what's mentioned above -- denying it or explaining it just means you're covering it up.

Do you really think Roswell uncovered aliens and the US government would issue a press release? My theory of a dumb cover story based on Ken Arnold is much more plausible than their theory that the US captured a saucer, wanted to tell the world and instead covered up all hard evidence proving the existence of saucers, anywhere, ever, to this day. Yeah, this government couldn't even keep Valerie Plame's CIA employment secret.

One more thing about aliens. Why is it that all of these major UFO events happened in the 40s and 50s? Why not the 90s, or 2000s? Why did alien/UFO footage suddenly dry up after we get a billion people walking around with video cameras on their cellphones? We should be seeing a legit UFO movie per week on YouTube, right?

We don't see this stuff anymore because that flying saucer bullshit was attractive then but isn't now. Now it's bullshit like Truthers and Scientology that turns that category of mainstream people on, and only true nutcases are left to peddle UFO bullshit.

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